4 Steps To Start A Conversation

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4 Steps to Start a Conversation[1]

How important is it to know how to start a conversation? Do a web search on the topic, ask friends or colleagues, and you will find out that most people have little idea how to do it, and are in fact petrified by the idea, mainly because they don’t want to face the kind of social rejection that is a possibility when trying to start a conversation.

Nonetheless, we are dealing with essential communication skills, ones that have the potential to make the difference in your life, both socially and professionally.

Try to keep in mind how often you have been standoffish in a crowd, how often you have given the false impression that you’re uninterested in getting to know others, until one person dares to approach you and start a conversation. Ten minutes later you can’t shut up, and you have a new friend or two.

We offer the following four steps to help you be that more daring person who will approach others and start a conversation that will continue on its own momentum.

 

Step 1: Use inviting body language
Body language can be natural, incidental or deliberate, but in any case, it is often the easiest language to read and understand. Before saying anything verbally, you have the opportunity to break the ice with body language to gives others the visual indication that you’re a friendly, inviting person.

This kind of body language includes simple things like an appropriate smile, and not closing yourself off with crossed arms or the low rumble of a scowl. Another way to seem more friendly when trying to start a conversation includes modulating your tone of voice and the pace at which you speak; a relaxed, self-confident voice is far more inviting than speaking quickly as though in a nervous panic, releasing a bored sigh, or saying your initial hello in a dull, disinterested tone.

That being said, people often appear standoffish; your job is to figure out whether or not they actually mean it. You may find out the hard way that they do mean it, or you could unlock another person’s shyness by challenging their seemingly defiant body language.

Step 2: Open with an open-ended question
We’ll never know how many potentially great conversations began with the question “How are you?” because they were dead from that moment on, typically brought to a quick end with the answer “Fine.” They die for a very simple reason: They started on the wrong foot. Questions that are very familiar to us elicit our most common responses. They make no demands on us to pause long enough to think about an answer; instead, we respond like a reflex. If you doubt us, ask yourself how many times you’ve been asked a question like “how are you?” and actually considered it?

Thus, at this step, your aim should be to pose a question that elicits a response longer than one or two words. What you ask may depend to some degree on your level of familiarity with the person you’re talking to — something to keep in mind while reading the following examples:

“What was the best part of your weekend?” beats “Did you have a good weekend?”

“What are your experiences living in this area?” beats “How long have you lived around here?”

“Tell me about your wife and your family” beats “Are you married?”

Step 3: Reword their answer into a new question
Good storytellers are not the same as good conversationalists. Storytellers monopolize a conversation, which can be either good or bad, while good conversationalists listen to others when they speak and ask the right questions when the opportunity arises.

To that end, you can keep this conversation rolling not by changing the subject or asking a new follow-up question. Rather, do so by rewording their answer into a new question, even if you know that you’re not really saying anything new. It won’t appear that way; instead, you give the impression that you’re listening, that you empathize and that you have a general rapport with this person — all key aspects of a good conversationalist. By doing so, you preempt the inclination to respond with unsolicited advice or a one-up story (things that can kill a conversation quickly), and you will allow the other person to delve deeper into the topic.

Step 4: Pass on control of the conversation
Up until now, you have attempted to steer and control the conversation without appearing overeager. At this point, you should have positioned the other person as the primary talker in the conversation and yourself as the listener. The wider benefit of this positioning is fairly simple: That person will more likely recall the conversation as an enjoyable one if they did more of the talking.
Human Nature 101 teaches us that, whether we’re fully aware of it or not, we are our own favorite topic. Coming in at a close second is whatever other topic we happen to be discussing at the moment.

Thus, provided you have them talking, you shouldn’t have to work so hard to maintain the flow of conversation.

Are You Falling For These Common Communication Myths?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Are you falling for these common communication myths?[1]

 Many executives I work with on communication issues have difficulties because they have believed some or all of these myths. As we work in challenging the myths, and start better practices, communications gets better. After today you should be able to recognize them in your communication.

Myth # 1. “I don’t have time for communication.”

Many leaders perceive communication takes too much of their precious time. The problem is that if you don’t take time to communicate, problems will multiply. You and your team will be more efficient, deal better with change, and have better relationships if you take the time to communicate.

In reality, NOT investing the time in effective business communication is very costly. The time you spend in communication will create more time for you in the long-run by ensuring understanding, focus, and efficiency.

Myth # 2. “If I don’t talk about it, it will go away.”

Do you tend to avoid difficult issues? In many of the businesses I work with there are “big elephants” sitting around everywhere. Everybody knows they are there, but nobody talks about them. The problem with avoidance is that problems compound, and people make all kinds of interpretations (right or wrong). It’s better to deal with reality.

In reality, our brains are made to try to solve puzzles. If the right information is not given, people will invent their own information and form their own judgements. Therefore, it’s much better to “take the bull by the horns” and bring the conversations into the open.

Myth # 3. “I already talked about this.”

Many leaders confuse talking with communication. Just because you are talking does not mean you are communicating. It does not necessarily means either that your listeners are understanding. In fact, a common complaint I hear is that someone talks too much and does not say anything.

To know if you are really communicating, think about these critical components:

• Flexibility: Adjust your message to the needs of your audience. Don’t just share “data.” You need to share what is relevant to the moment and the people involved. You need to give what they need, not what you love to talk about. It’s about them, not about you.
• Engagement: Get the interest and attention of your people by engaging them. A dialogue is always more effective than a monologue. You need to listen at least as much as you talk. Take emotions into consideration too.
• Truthfulness: You have to be honest and consistent if you want people to listen, respect, and understand. Yes, as a leader there are confidential issues you can’t share. But you don’t have to lie about situations either. It’s better to say you are sharing what you can share at the moment, than to say nobody is going to be layoff when you know that next week you have to let people go. Tell as much of the truth as you can and help people see how their efforts contribute to the business.
• Efficiency: Think of the most direct and concise way you can deliver your message. Also consider what will be the best channel, or combination of channels, for delivering the information e.i. e-mail, face-to-face, individual, group, voice-message, etc.

 

Remember. . .

These 3 myths about communication originate from wrong assumptions. Don’t confuse assumptions with facts. Don’t fall prey of common myths. Instead, take time to communicate, bring up difficult issues for dialogue, and make sure you are communicating, not just talking. You will see how much effective your communication will be.

Share your thoughts

Are you letting these 3 myths rule your communications?

How do you make sure you are communicating effectively?

Seven Things To Do Before You Start Your Business

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seven Things to Do Before You Start Your Business[1]

 You’ve got a business idea that you think will be a sensation and you’re eager to break out on your own. But where do you start? The process of getting your business up and running may not be as difficult as you think. Here’s a step-by-step breakdown of what it will take to start cashing in on your great idea.

1. Make sure your business concept is something that will keep your interest in the long run.

”You have to have a degree of passion if you are going to start a business,” said Thomas Shinick, professor at Adelphi University in Garden City, N.Y. and president and CEO of Corporate Development Partners, a management consulting firm. “There is tons of information out there about scouting the right location and obtaining the proper business licenses for your startup business, but if it is not something you truly care about, it is going to sink. I’ve seen too many people simply take over a business because it was available to buy, not because it was something they necessarily dreamed of doing. You’ll be sacrificing a lot of time to get your business off the ground. Make sure it is something you want to invest your time in pursuing.”

2. Educate yourself. “Take courses online or at a university and look into courses offered through your chamber of commerce and the Small Business Administration,” Shinick said. “If you can, work part time in the industry so that you get a feel for the business.”

3. Write a business plan to help move things forward. “A lot of people might argue that you don’t need a business plan, but putting things down on paper validates your idea,” Shinick said. “It will help you obtain the capital you need and will show that you have thought your idea through.”

4. Assemble a board of advisers to talk things out. “Include professors, accountants, attorneys and bankers,” Shinick said. “This will provide you with people to bounce your ideas off of and add credibility when you move forward with your plan. Investors like to see that you have fleshed your idea out.”

5. Get an accountant on board early in the process. “I had a full-time job as I considered starting my own business in 2009, but I did a lot of groundwork before I started, and bringing on an accountant was an important step,” said Sarah Burningham, owner of Little Bird, a New York-based public relations, marketing and branding firm. “People didn’t understand why I would consult an accountant before I left my job or made any money with my new venture, but it helped me understand what I needed to do to make this work from a profit standpoint and the ins and outs of state, federal and local taxes.”

6. Understand how you will acquire customers. “Depending on the type of business you are starting, foot traffic and word of mouth is very important at the beginning,” said Stewart Wall, CEO of New York-based Signpost, an online local marketing service.

Determine how you will build an online presence with social networks such as Twitter and Yelp. “Have those in place before you start,” Stewart said.

Every business has a fixed cost regardless of how many customers they have, so it is important to have a plan to acquire new customers quickly and keep the existing ones if you are taking over a business, he said.

7. Gather demographic data and explore the neighborhood where you want to locate your business. “Don’t just lease space because you go by there every day and think, ‘Oh, that’s a great location,’” said Devon Wolfe, managing director of Americas strategy and analytics service for Pitney Bowes Business Insight, a Troy, N.Y.-based division of Pitney Bowes that provides customer relationship data and analytics. “Even being on the wrong side of the street can have an impact on your business success. Visit the site on different days and at different times of the day,” Wolfe said.

As Social Media Grow, So Does First Amendment Appreciation

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As social media grow, so does First Amendment appreciation

Each year, on Constitution Day, students and teachers celebrate the most fundamental laws of our republic. This year, they should celebrate Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr and all other social media children of the digital age.

Why? Because, it turns out, social media are good for the Constitution. Specifically, social media are good for the First Amendment, the lead item of the Bill of Rights, etched into our national history in 1791:

“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.”

The Future of the First Amendment, a new study being released today by the John S. and James L. Knight Foundation, concludes that today’s social media fads are good for that 220-year-old law.

As researcher Ken Dautrich puts it: “There is a clear, positive relationship between student usage of social media to get news and information and greater support for free expression rights.”

The University of Connecticut professor has done four major national surveys of high school students on First Amendment issues and has co-written The Future of the First Amendment: Digital Media, Civic Education and Free Expression Rights in the Nations’ High Schools. This spring, he surveyed 12,090 high school students and 900 high school teachers for the latest survey.

The findings are exciting.

Fully 91 percent of students who use social networking to get news and information on a daily basis believe people should be allowed to express unpopular opinions. But only 77 percent of those who never use social networks to get news agree that unpopular opinions should be allowed.

These sorts of surveys are good at establishing connections, but not as good at explaining what causes what. Does social media make you a First Amendment lover? Or do First Amendment lovers just use more social media? I think it’s both.

Students using their cell phones to text, tweet, blog and Google are finding out more about the world — like this year’s Arab Spring — as well as the connection between social media and freedom.

Since young people represent the future of American public opinion, they are the real overseers of the future of the First Amendment.

That’s why we survey their attitudes.

This year, not all the news is good. While more students now understand that government can’t censor the media in this country, nearly 40 percent of them still don’t understand that. While more students say they think about the First Amendment, most of them still don’t.

And there is still plenty to teach about how responsibility comes along with all these rights.

Even so, when the numbers start to move in the right direction, it’s cause for celebration.

Are young people learning as much about freedom via texting than they are via teaching? Maybe. To their credit, teachers say they think there needs to be a lot more digital media literacy education in schools. I agree.

The dawning of a new digital age in communications has dramatically changed how we consume news and information. Students are adapting to these new tools faster than adults, using them for networking and news, and now, to better appreciate freedom.

Maybe we can learn something from them.

Vertrauen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Vertrauen

 1.1 Einführung

Vertrauen bekommt man nicht umsonst. Vertrauen muss man “verdienen”. Man muss sich anstrengen, das Vertrauen anderer Personen zu gewinnen. Das ist aber nicht so einfach.

Frage nun ist: Wie kann man Vertrauen aufbauen? Wie kann man Vertrauen zu Menschen aus anderen Ländern mit ihren oft altangestammten Sitten und Gewohnheiten gewinnen? Die Praxis zeigt, dass, wenn man erfolgreich Vertrauen zu anderen aufbauen will, man ein Höchstmaß an Selbstvertrauen, das heißt Vertrauen zu sich selber haben soll. Denn ohne Selbstvertrauen wirkt man unsicher auf andere. Und das ist nicht gerade ein solide Grundlage zum Vertrauensaufbau.

Es gibt Menschen, die weisen Selbstvertrauen auf, und es gibt solche, die haben es nicht. Diejenigen, die es haben, schauen uns geradewegs in die Augen und schütteln uns fest die Hand. Solche Menschen scheinen ein Abonnement auf die guten Plätze des Lebens zu haben. Diejenigen, die es nicht haben sind die ewigen Zweiten. Es sind diejenigen, die zum Beispiel nicht den Mut haben, eine bestimmte Bitte abzulehnen und dadurch “Ja” sagen.  Obschon sie lieber “Nein” gesagt hätten!

1.2  Selbstvertrauen stärken[1]

Wir haben verschiedene Möglichkeiten, unser Selbstvertrauen zu stärken. Wichtig ist nur, dass wir diese konsequent nutzen und einsehen, dass die Arbeit an unserem Selbstver-trauen nicht eine kurzfristige Übung ist.

Drei Ansatzpunkte:

Kopf (Denken)

•   Denkmuster, die uns belasten erkennen und ändern;

•   Zweifeln und Selbstabwertung stoppen (positive, innere Dialoge);

•   Erfahrungen und Erlebnisse verarbeiten;

•   Ehrliches Selbstbild erarbeiten.

Herz (Fühlen)

•   Freude, Begeisterung, Mut und Spass am Tun und sich selbst überwinden entwickeln;

•   Angst, Unsicherheitsgefühle und Ärger (über sich selbst) wirksam

begegnen;

•   Gelassenheit entwickeln;

•   Loslassen, entspannen, innere Ruhe finden;

•   Körperliches Selbstvertrauen und natürliche Autorität entwickeln;

•   Nervosität, flaues Gefühl, Zittern und andere körperliche Zeichen;

Hand (Handeln)

•   Herausforderungen annehmen, sich etwas zutrauen;

•   Erfolgserlebnisse sammeln;

•   Selbstsicheres Auftreten und sichere Körpersprache.

X-Ray Vision Needed To See Through Business Cluster

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

X-ray vision needed to see through business clutter[1]

 Martin Broughton, the Chairman of British Airways, has stirred up controversy by suggesting that some of the security checks we go through at an airport are unnecessary. He has a point. I asked an airport security officer recently why I needed to take my laptop out of my bag. After all, I said, your X-Ray machine can see through the bag…! I merely got “I’m only doing my job sir” reply. I was then “randomly” selected to remove my belt, shoes, and have a “rub down” inspection. It took almost as long to get through security as it did to fly to Edinburgh…!

The problem is everyone is doing the “laptop out of the bag” routine because at one point, almost ten years ago, it seemed like a good idea and there was some logic to it. But now, if you ask, no-on really knows why it is done. The reasoning has got lost in the mists of time. Now it is done because it “has always been done” and because it is on some international “security check-list”. That doesn’t mean it is the right thing to do. It was once, but perhaps it is not now – perhaps it is. But, as Mr Broughton says, it is sure in need of review.

And that is the message that many online business owners need to take on board. There is tons of stuff done online because, well, it has always been done. It was a good idea – indeed the right idea back in the mists of internet time (a year or two ago) – but is it the right thing to do now? For instance, you can still find advice online about having the right “meta tags” in your web pages. People still ask me about what order to put meta tags in, how many words they should have and so on. But meta tags are old technology – Google admits it doesn’t use them, so why are you bothering?

Then there’s the myth about “the sales funnel”. Get them in at one end, so the theory goes, and you can then spend week after week upselling and upselling until eventually the only people left are those buying your £10,000 product. Nice idea ten years ago when people were not surrounded by sales funnels. Now, you can’t move for them – and people are rejecting them left right and centre because they are bored and fed up with them. Yet, each day, people go “gosh everyone is doing it, so it must be the right thing to do”.

Equally, there are people who check their email every 15 minutes because that is the default setting of their software which they have never changed. Why is the default set like that? Not because it is the right thing to do, but almost certainly because it exposes users to more advertising on the likes of Bing, Yahoo or Gmail. Just because there is logic to it, doesn’t mean it is the right thing to do.

So, ask yourself this question: how often have you reviewed all your online processes to make sure they are the right thing to do? If you rarely review things, many of your online processes and systems may be as a result of historical convention rather than being a current necessity. And rather like the airport business, you could end up wasting hours and hours doing unnecessary things that achieve nothing for your online business.

 

A Simple Way to Calculate Social Media Return on Investment

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Simple Way to Calculate Social Media Return on Investment[1]

 Social media return on investment (ROI) is simply a measurement of efficiency. It’s a lot of things to a lot of people: “return on inactivity,” “return on innovation” and “return on engagement.”

However, in a stricter sense, social media ROI is defined as a measure of the efficiency of a social media marketing campaign. This definition might sound complicated, but in reality, it’s quite simple.

What Does ROI Really Mean?

Let’s backtrack a bit.

We’ve all heard what “ROI” stands for, but what’s less understood is the actual meaning and the importance of ROI.

In the financial world, ROI is used to measure the financial efficiency of an investment. ROI is based on the financial formula:

ROI = (return – investment) / investment %.

This means that if you increase your return while keeping your investment the same, then you increase your ROI. This is good. If you decrease your return while keeping your investment the same, then the ROI goes down. That’s bad. A high ROI is better than a low ROI.

Because the ROI formula uses only two inputs – the return and the investment – the ROI formula is an easy way to measure and compare marketing campaigns. A marketing campaign with a high ROI is considered better and more efficient than a marketing campaign with a lower ROI.

It’s important to understand that ROI measures the efficiency of an investment because then you also understand that ROI cannot be defined using alternative definitions. “Return on inactivity” does not help you measure the efficiency of your campaign.

Social Media ROI Uses The Return And The Investment

Now, all we need is to take our social media return (the amount of value that we got from our social media campaign) and our social media investment (the amount of money that we invested in our social media campaign) and run it through the financial ROI formula.

Social media ROI = (SM return – SM investment) / SM investment %.

Simple, right? Not so fast. The social media investment is clearly defined, but how do you define the social media return and how do you attach a dollar value to the return? We need to answer both questions before we can calculate the social media ROI.

Social Media Return Is The Return On Your Social Media Goals

The peculiar feature of the social media return is that you can define it to be essentially anything you want it to be!

Brian Solis from the Altimeter Group puts it even more succinctly in his article ROI Doesn’t Stand for Return on Ignorance: “Everything starts with an end in mind.”

In reality, social media return is the value that you derive from your social media campaign. For instance, if the goal of your social media campaign is to drive sales, then your social media return is the number of sales that you can attribute to your social media campaign.

Instead of sales, say your goal is to drive consumer insights. In this case, your social media return is the quantity and quality of the consumer insights you get from your fans and followers.

A third example of social media return is brand awareness. If your goal is to drive awareness of your brand, then your social media return is brand awareness.

I could give many more examples, but the point is that social media return is the value that you derive from social media based on the goals of your campaign. (Note that the number of followers, fans, Likes and comments are not social media campaign goals.)

Quantifying Social Media Return

After we have defined our social media return, we need to quantify the social media return into dollars and cents. This is difficult because you need to look at each type of social media return and develop a method for dollar quantification.

For instance, looking strictly at sales, we can quantify the social media return by looking at “last touch” sales, or we can use sales forecasting techniques or use unique identifiers such as coupon codes.

Quantifying consumer insights is harder and requires different techniques to estimate value.

One commonly used technique is to compare the quantity and quality of consumer insights from offline focus groups to consumer insights from your social media campaign.

The idea is that you know the value of consumer insights from offline focus groups based on their cost. By comparing the quantity and quality of consumer insights from both channels, you arrive at a reasonable estimate of the value of consumer insights from your social media campaign.

Brand awareness requires yet another method. In April 2010, social media analytics company Vitrue made quite a stir when they stated that according to their research, the average Facebook fan is estimated to be worth $3.60. Vitrue looked at the average number of messages each fan received and then compared this number to what it would cost to purchase impressions to send the same number of messages to each fan.

Use Social Media ROI To Compare Apples To Apples

After estimating your return and your investment, you use the ROI formula to calculate your social media ROI.

Remember, ROI is a measurement of efficiency, so having calculated the ROI of your social media campaign, you use the ROI number to compare to other social media campaigns and also your TV, print, radio and other campaigns.

ROI is possibly the most powerful tool in your marketing toolbox. This sentiment is demonstrated in Amy Porterfield’s post, Study Reveals Top 6 Social Media Goals for 2011, where she correctly points out that according to the Altimeter Group, 48.3% of all corporate social strategists will have social media ROI as their highest focus in 2011.

ROI is a very powerful weapon in your marketing arsenal.

[1] http://goo.gl/VB0wa

Prof. C.J.M. Beniers

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